Extreme Dad

小时候，我对每个秋季都充满兴奋和期待，因为秋季意味着新学期的开始和新朋友的到来。但是，我对于男孩子们之间常常相互询问的一个问题却没有任何期待之情，这个问题就是：“你爸爸是做什么工作的？”一些人可能已经不记得读书期间被问过这个问题，但是这个问题对我来说，却有一定的分量。我父亲是好莱坞的一名特技演员，最近刚刚退休。我还是个孩子的时候，他一周之内做过的玩命的事情比我一辈子做的都多。他那份不同寻常的工作和活力四射的生活方式让他成为我们镇上最酷的爸爸，我不能辜负他响亮的名声呀。

对于美国男孩来说，没有一块木板是安全的，因为它的斜面可以被用于各种冒险游戏。我们会把几块木板叠放在一块空心砖上，然后看看木板的一端能够把坐在自行车或者滑板上的我们弹多高。这个游戏太有趣了，足够我们玩好几年也不会觉得腻。但是，爸爸的名气最终给我带来了小麻烦。很快，他们就希望来点儿更疯狂的尝试：自制一个发射台。他们催促我去找爸爸帮忙。起初我不同意，因为我可不想在我们街区带头玩冒险游戏。谁知道街对面的老太太会怎么想呢？

结果，对于向我朋友们传授点儿特技这件事，爸爸比我热心多了。他建议说与其造一个大滑坡，不如在我家后院那棵大黄松上造一个平台，这样我们可以用根绳子从上面滑下来。虽然我觉得这个主意太疯狂了，但还是向爸爸做了让步。他总喜欢说那句陈词滥调：“相信我，我可是专业人士。”于是，那个下午，我和我的朋友们还有爸爸一起上了卡车，向伐木场驶去。去的路上，我也开始觉得在我家后院建绳索速降台这个主意挺不错。朋友们的兴奋之情溢于言表，毕竟，他们要在一个真正的特技演员的监督下做一件疯狂的事情！

爸爸快速灵活地穿行在伐木场的过道上，敏捷的身手令人震惊不已。在等待切割木板的空档，他往手推车上放了各种让小男孩着迷的材料：钉子，螺钉，胶水，铁链，缆绳，螺母和螺栓。这应该是我和朋友们第一次用这些闪闪发亮的崭新材料建造东西。毫无疑问，这将成为镇上最惊险最棒的特技。回到家以后，我们把车上的所有材料都卸到了松树附近。看着车尾的行李箱，我和朋友们都觉得这些建筑材料真是酷毙了，但是却不知道该怎么把它们弄到树上去。这时候，爸爸从车库走出来。“这是最后一件了，”他手里拿着一根攀登安全带和绳索，“现在我要爬上去造这个平台了。你们可以挑两个人上来帮我递东西。”接下来的一个钟头里，我们目瞪口呆地坐着看爸爸忙活。爸爸将绳索的一端缠在双臂上，紧紧系好，然后踩着两个攀登器慢慢向上爬。不一会儿，他就爬到了

树杈处。站稳以后，爸爸将一段绳子放下来。“将6毫米的钻头给我吊上来。”他喊道。我们把钻头准备好，然后系到绳子上。爸爸把钻头吊上去，用它在树上打了几个螺栓孔。我们就这样一点点往上送东西。螺栓，螺母，最后终于轮到了木板。

爸爸用闪电般的速度搭建着平台。他拧螺丝的速度之快，让我一个朋友看得目瞪口呆。不久之后，爸爸对我们说一切就绪，可以进行“初步测试”了。我不知道他这样说是什么意思。“向后退，伙计们。”爸爸喊道。我们赶紧照做。爸爸站在平台上，他站得那么高，看起来却很舒服的样子。尽管知道他身上还绑着安全带，我们还是不由自主地为他感到紧张害怕。爸爸好像对自己的工作很满意，就踮起脚轻快地跳了几下。平台纹丝不动。接下来，他又大幅度地上下跳了几次，平台被震动了，连树枝都跟着摇晃起来。不过，平台看起来建造得很牢固安全。“好了，让我们学习如何用绳索下来吧。”

爸爸用绳子从上面滑下来，然后把我们召集到车库的阁楼里。那个地方我去过几次，觉得一点儿也不好玩。不过，这次爸爸从那个古老的壁橱后面拿出一个满是灰尘的黑色箱子。以前，我从来没有见过它。爸爸从里面取出绳索和安全带，接着是登山索和下降装置。我们急切地把这些装备接过来，然后拿到后院。爸爸给我们系好安全带，又临时给我们上了一堂安全课，主要是关于攀爬和下降时候需要注意的安全事项。在房顶上练习了几个小时以后，我们已经做好充分的准备去挑战后院那棵大松树了。

Extreme Dad

As I was growing up, each autumn brought with it the excitement of a new school year and new friends. However, I did not look forward to the inevitable question young boys pose to one another:“What does your dad do?”Some people cannot remember being asked that question in school, but it bears special weight for me. My father is recently retired from his career as a Hollywood stunt performer. When I was a child,he would do more death-defying tricks in a week than I’m sure I will ever do in my lifetime. My father’s extreme career and energetic lifestyle made him the coolest dad in town, and I had to live up to him.

For American boys, no piece of plywood is safe: it has “ramp”written all over.We would prop some plywood up on a cinderblock and see how high it could launch us on a bike or skates. That was sufficiently fun for years, but eventually my father’s reputation caught up with me. Soon, my friends wanted to go bigger with the idea of a homemade launch pad. They urged me to seek my father’s help. At first, I resisted, since I didn’t want to start a trend of hair-raising stunts on my neighborhood street.

Who knows what the old lady across the street would think?As it turned out, my father was more eager than I was to introduce some stunts to my group of friends. Instead of building a giant ramp, he suggested, why not build a platform high in the ponderosa pine tree out back from which we could rappel to the ground? It sounded crazy to me, but I yielded to my father. He loved the cliche appeasement. “Trust me; I’m a professional. ”So, that afternoon, my friends, father,

and I piled in the truck and headed for the lumberyard. By this time, I was starting to warm to the idea of a rappelling platform in my backyard. My friends could hardly contain their excitement. After all, they were about to do something crazy under the supervision of a real stuntman.

My father cruised the aisles at the lumberyard with amazing deftness and efficiency.

As he waited for some plywood to be cut, he filled his cart with all kinds of materials that little boys love: nails, screws, glue, chain, cable, nuts, and bolts. This would be the first time my friends and I had built anything out of shiny, new parts. No doubt this would be the most awesome stunt in town.

When we returned home, we unloaded all of the supplies near the base of the tree. Looking up the trunk, my friends and I realized we had a lot of cool building materials but no way to get them up the tree. At that moment, my dad emerged from the garage.“Here’s the last piece. ”He held a climbing harness and rope in his hands. “Now I’m going to go up there and build the structure, then two of you can come up and help with the rigging. ”For the next hour, we sat in stunned silence. My father threw one end of his rope around an upper limb, secured it, and started the slow process ofdrawing on the two mechanical ascenders. Before long, he had reached the notch in

the tree, braced himself, and sent down a length of cord to us. “Put a quarter-inch bit in the drill and send it up. ”he cried. We prepared the drill and tied it to the line.

My father hoisted it and bored the boltholes into the tree. We repeated this process with two-by-fours, bolts, nuts, and finally the plywood square that would become this platform. My father built it with lightning speed. One of my friends gaped at how quickly my father could drive screws. Before long, Dad called down saying everything was finished and ready for“preliminary testing. ”I didn’t know what he meant by that. “Stand back, guys. ”my dad called. We hastily obliged. My father, already standing on the platform, looked strangely comfortable so high in the ponderosa tree.Granted, he was still in his harness roped to the tree, but nerves have a funny way of ignoring appeals to logic. Satisfied with his handiwork, my dad began bouncing lightly on the balls of his feet. The platform didn’t budge. Next, he started jumping up and down violently. This shook the platform and made the tree sway, but everything seemed soundly built and tightly secured. “All right, now we learn to rappel. ”

My father slid down his rope and called us to join him in the attic of the garage.I had only seen what was up there a few times, and it mostly bored me. Behind an old armoire, though, was a dusty black trunk that I had never see before. My father began pulling ropes and harnesses from it, then carabiners and rappelling devices. We eagerly grabbed the equipment and took it to the backyard. My father fit us for the harnesses and began an impromptu lesson on the critical safety rules of climbing and rappelling.

In a few hours and after a little practice off the roof of the house, we were all ready to tackle the huge tree in the back yard.